Last Post...

Frankie's bday was on 23rd of April, and you guessed it, she turned 20! So she is no longer a teenager. She has decided to go away, but don't worry, perhaps you might see her someday.

She sent this message:

Sing me no songs,
cry me no tears,
but remember me kindly.

To all the people who were made her days, kina modo, Xs, Acolyte and all the rest on her blogroll, thanks.

Perhaps you might find her here. Perhaps not.

Tough Questions: I need Answers!!

I am back from my long long holiday. I have had time to think and contemplate how my first year in campus went, and am just waiting to go back and start my second year.

okay, here goes, just how do relationships work? I mean, like how long do you date someone before you finally start making out? Is it the first opportunity you get alone? Or don't you think you should know second names first? Besides, what if you don't want to have sex (ok, u do but yuou know u shouldn't or u know u should at least wait) but u still wanna make out? for how long will you make out without actually having sex? a year? 4 years? it's just crazy.

besides, am sure every girl (or guy) wants the first time to be special, not in some dingy room in the college hostel where u are afraid of screaming out incase walls have ears? they actually do..some chick sleeps with some guy and the following day the whole campus knows.

or perhaps he takes u to the privacy of his room at home coz his paroz are out of town, but shish..it is his parents house and if they come back before time, u hide in the closet? that just ain't right...

or some hotel room. except at this stage...most guys are just not that moneyed, so u will probably end up in some dingy lodging, making the sex just cheap...and somehow dirty like u a hooker or something...

what about the endless warnings that ur mum never fails to give whenever she calls? they always pop into your head. never mind the bible teachings about waiting for marriage, don't u feel like a pretender, hypocrite when u are sleeping around yet u still go to church? doesn't God condemn sex before marriage?

ok, so u meet a guy u like, u have some sort of date..not those stuff of eating at a fancy restaurant with rules n expensive meals (that could pay my accomodation for the whole semester), but more like oily fries and drumsticks from kenchic, and maybe a movie....or most likely inter-campus visits, he comes over, u go to his place...how long do u wait before sleeping with a guy? and don't say on the third date...i mean, he should be hunter, right? am sure they wont appreciate prey that just gives in...so anyway, what's to stop him from leaving once he's slept with u? wasn't that his goal from the beginning?

am so f***ing confused. besides, am i supposed to wait till i marry before..u know... what if i get married at 28?

of course, am so afraid of getting paged, stds (they are so many, some with no symptoms in guys but in chicks and vice versa..some are untreatable) or who can forget HIV? then there are the contraceptives. condoms just seem cheap, they burst (am told their success rate is 99%, but what if am the 0ne percent? someone had to account for it, right?), and i don't think i can be popping a pill everyday...it just seems so much work n worry for so little pleasure..('course don't know how much pleasure coz u know am yet to try it..)

isn't it much easier to just abstain? except abstaining is not that easy either.

P.S.
as u answer, do u mind sharing ur first experiences in not so many words? or when u think the right time. do u wish u had waited? a different time? a different person? answer honestly and help a sister out....

Still on Holiday

Hey, am posting a postcard of me on holiday!

Enjoy!

Am Back

i do not have time to write a longer post, but i shall say a few words. i do not like politics, but i hated the violence that rocked the country following the stealing of votes by Kibaki. i breathed a sigh of relief yesterday when they signed the peace deal. i do no think that another politician will dare do that again. we're beyond petty undemocratic politics though corruption still continues to haunt us.

on a happier note, am in the land of sand n sun; i have a 3 month holiday am determined to enjoy it to the maximum. so allow me to swim in warm azure oceans and will post another one soon when time and access to internet allow.

p.s. Xs, u still in kenya? email me, sawa?

My Xmas shoutouts

Exams came and went, I stayed a few days longer in campo waiting for my friends so we could have an end of the year bash, which was great fun despite the many gate crashers.. or should i say bash-crashers?

Anyway, so am headed to shaggz for xmas, where i shall drink lots and lots of.... tea, and mandazi! For all drinkers, don't overdo vodowski and other refined brews, spare a thought for the local brew too.... It doesn't matter whether Jesus was born on 25th or not, he was born, period, and it is a good reason to celebrate....

So, see you next year, and though i steer away from politics, vote wisely ( I got my ID too late to register... so I guess my view don't count for much)

end of the year

Now that is has come to the end of the year, it is double celebration for me. I am finishing the year as well as my first year in campus. I have made many friends as well as enemies (am not too sure about this….)

I want to dedicate this post to all my friends out here…

Cracker
Can u believe I went to high school with her but we never spoke more than a paragraph. She was in the group of good girls, and I was apparently a bad girl.. and to imagine we used to sleep in adjacent rooms. So when I was reporting this year, and saw her that first day, we said hi like a couple of strangers, only to realize we had been put in the same room… and thus began a friendship with her … and some other people she looks like she is high all the time so they nicknamed her Cracker..

Dan
Now her, we may almost have started out on the wrong foot (we-cracker and I- thought she had ATT (attitude)), turns out well, that we rely on first impressions but now.. she is the party girl of the group.. we have fikad many campo bashes together.. since cracker prefers her sleep.. watched people do stuff while drunk (we don’t drink..) had fun and finally go to sleep in the early hours of the morning when the campo geeks are waking up to read…..

Miss dump me (Sarah)
Actually, she transferred to another campo but she was the fourth roommate, and we still keep in touch… and well u should hear her say the name Sarah…

Sarah
Now this guy impressed cracker the first time she met him in class. She just came rushing into the room and blurted out “ Heeey, there is this guy I met in class today, he is so eloquent.. blah blah blah… so blah blah blah” Turns out she was right. What can I say… I have no words. Okay, how about: I will cross the oceans for you, I will light your way for all time, etc etc, get the drift?

Pat
If there is a word for him, it is sweet. I mean, I have never seen him mad (he’s been mad at Cracker before..) but me, or anyone else for that matter.. nope. Oh, he is generous too..

Floppy
Wassup nigga! Says it all
Okay, let me say a little about this nigga: he has a full face (as Cracker says it he..he..) and has an Afro, he is easy going and just easy going, yeah.

Ted
Sarah’s good brother…. Almost the exact opposite of Sarah..

There are many more friends I have made.. it is just that I can’t list them all, including friends of my friends, who also become my friends by default. Then there are my classmates, some of whom I’ll be glad I wont be seeing for the next 4 months, others I will genuinely miss.
Then there are the bloggers.. but I shall be in touch, hopefully, there is internet where am headed for holiday. I would like to mention one blogger who influenced me to start wrting, goes by the name Nesta, though he got lazy and updates his blog once in two blue moons….

Goodbye for now, for I do not know how long it will take me before the next post. I start exams this Thursday (6th December), so wish me success.

The Magic is Gone

The cold morning breeze
Brings a promise of better things
And although I may freeze
Like a bird on its wings
I take a walk through the forest
The sun’s rays are just breaking through
And their myriad patterns
Are like a lover’s dance
The dew glistens on the leaves
The dancing shafts of light from the sun’s rays
Create a beautiful kaleidoscope of colour
I pick up a leaf
And hold it to the sun
Suddenly the dawn breaks
The dew evaporates
And the magic is lost